Pregnant in College: What Do I Tell My Professors?

Finding out you’re pregnant in college can feel overwhelming, terrifying, and even embarrassing. Above all, you may be unsure how motherhood will impact your education, especially when you’ve worked so hard to succeed.

When I became pregnant my junior year of college, I experienced all that and more.

I began the semester excited for my business school classes and was looking forward to a future career in human resources. One week later I was staring at a positive pregnancy test, and my whole world turned upside down.

My mind was racing. How would I graduate? Was I allowed to miss class for doctor’s appointments? Would my professors judge me? For those first few weeks the unknowns felt endless, but taking it one day at a time gradually lessened my anxiety.

In the end, I was able to maintain a working relationship with all of my professors, make the dean’s list, and give birth to a healthy baby boy after finishing the school year. This is how I did it:

Map Out Your Semester

Whether you find yourself pregnant at the start of the school year or mid semester, planning ahead is a great first step to help you succeed.

Gather your syllabi from all your classes and highlight important due dates and presentation days, then write them all down on one calendar.

This will help when scheduling prenatal appointments for the rest of the semester. Does your due date fall before the end of the semester? Use an online due date calculator to estimate the weeks you may be absent from class, and mark them on your calendar as well. Make note of any exams or assignments that conflict with your upcoming delivery.

Talk to Your Advisor First

Before talking to your professors about your pregnancy and upcoming conflicts, I recommend speaking with your college or universities academic advisor, disability center coordinator, or guidance counselor. They can give you detailed information on the policies of your school, help you prepare to talk with your professors, and become your advocate should you experience any pushback from your educators. Their job is to support you and your academic endeavors, pregnant and parenting students included.

Tell Your Professors

The most important step to navigating a successful semester as a pregnant student is informing your professors of your pregnancy. This is a very personal conversation that requires vulnerability, and you may feel embarrassed or unsure how they will react. It is absolutely normal to feel some anxiety when telling professors you’re pregnant. However, throughout my whole college experience, every professor I spoke to was extremely supportive of my pregnancy.

Most teachers are willing to be flexible and help you through their class, as long as you are striving and working hard. It might feel daunting, but you are strong enough to advocate for yourself and your education.

There are a couple ways to approach the conversation.

1. Talk in person: If you have a good relationship with your professor, consider talking with them during their office hours.

2. Write an email: If you prefer to write out a message to break the news, email works as well. But be sure to introduce yourself at some point, so they have a face (and belly) to put to your name.

Regardless of which method you use, informing your professors of your pregnancy early on goes a long way in building trust and a good relationship, so make sure it’s top priority.

Sample Email for Your Professor

Below is a sample email for your professor. Tweak it to reflect your specific needs, especially if you’re dealing with particularly difficult pregnancy symptoms, like nausea, vomiting, or ordered bed rest:

Your professors should respond courteously and treat you professionally. The details of your pregnancy are private and yours alone to share. So if someone asks you questions that make you feel uncomfortable, you don’t have to answer them and consider speaking with your advisor.

Title IX: Know Your Rights

If you’re nervous about penalties for missing class or afraid of backlash from your professors, there is a law in place that protects pregnant students from discrimination.

Title IX is a federal law that bans sex discrimination in schools that receive federal funds.

The law specifies certain rules the school must follow² and opportunities they must provide to you as a pregnant student. Here are just a few¹:

• Your school must excuse absences due to pregnancy or childbirth for as long as your doctor deems it necessary.
• Your professor must allow you to submit work after a deadline you missed because of pregnancy-related conflicts or childbirth.
• If you miss class because of pregnancy-related conflicts or childbirth, you must be allowed to make up the participation or attendance credits you didn’t have the chance to earn.
• Your school cannot make you take time off if you don’t want to and cannot exclude you from a school-based program because of your pregnancy.

In summary, your pregnancy should not and cannot be a reason for you to be treated unfairly inside or outside the classroom. If you want to learn more about pregnancy descrimination you can read about it here.

Find Your Title IX Coordinator

Your campus should have a Title IX coordinator, or someone who functions as one, who can speak with you if you feel your rights as a pregnant student are being violated. Your advisor and guidance counselor may also be able to help.

If a professor doesn’t want you in class or degrades you because you’re pregnant, this is illegal. Inform one of these officials as soon as possible. Just like any other student, you may enroll in whatever course you want, provided you meet the prerequisites.

Be Proactive

For you, this pregnancy is always at the front of your mind. You’re constantly navigating the new changes your body is going through, all while trying to stay on top of your education. But it isn’t the same for others around you. Professors can have thousands of students, and it is easy for them to get confused or miss emails. If this happens, try not to take it personally.

While it does take extra work, try your best to stay on top of missed assignments and anticipate upcoming conflicts with your classes, instead of relying on professors to remind you. Offering a suggestion for making up work or rescheduling a test can be extremely helpful to busy professors.

If a decision was made between you and your professor in class, send them a brief email with your name, class number, and the arrangements discussed in person. This allows professors to have a written reminder, but it also creates documentation should any problems arise later. By taking initiative to be proactive, you can ensure the best possible success in your classes.

Your Future is Bright

Write down all your important dates for the semester, pregnancy and course-related. Then prioritize telling your professors about your pregnancy to create a solution together, and consider planning that conversation first with your academic advisor. Do this early on to allow more time to make plans for exams, finals, or projects, especially if they fall around your due date or important doctor’s appointments.

Learn your rights as a pregnant college student under Title IX, and make sure to find your Title IX coordinator on campus. And finally, be confident and proactive with your professors as the semester goes on, and they will respect (and remember) you for it.

I began my junior year of college terrified at the prospect of not being able to finish my bachelors degree as a single mom. Eighteen months later, I received my diploma with my son watching in the stands. As I walked across the stage, I could not have been more proud of the hard work and time I spent completing my education.

Your dreams and goals have not been taken away because of your pregnancy, even if the road to them looks different now. In fact, you are taking the steps to ensure a BRIGHT future for you and your child, which is something to be proud of.